I am admitting there are days when my fuse is short. It doesn't take much to make me angry on these days. I pray these days are nonexistent, yet somehow, someway, I tend to have these days pop up when I least expect them...and yes you guessed it, today has been one of those days!!!!!
The family woke up in good moods. We had made to do lists last night and had the day planned out. Everyone had things that needed to get done before the day was over, and we set out to start our tasks. But before I knew it both girls had disobeyed; they were fighting with each other; they were both whining about the worksheets we were working on, and after a couple of hours I had lost my temper. I was short with my husband and had snapped at him and my kids :(
We had just had the most wonderful of mother's days. (I hope yours was fabulous too.) I had plenty of surprises, one of which my oldest daughter had picked out and had been dying to give me. There were cards and crafts and a rose and a balloon. There was singing and sweet kisses and hugs. We had a wonderful day at church and were even able to become official members after the service. We ate the most delicious meal at one of our local favorites. We took a nap - YAY for Sunday naps. We played outside; we played games, and we even watched some of American Funniest Home Videos. My perfect day!!!!!
And now this......
Beating myself up is what I do best, and today I was a pro! I felt horrible for my short fuse, but what kept ringing in the back of my mind was the Bible verses I had read just a few hours before. I have been doing a Bible study on Philippians (which is one of my most favorite books of the Bible), and I had completed one of the chapters right before bed last night. As an assignment, I had to look up commentary of Philippians 3:16, "Nevertheless, whereto we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let us mind the same thing." My findings for that verse plus verses 13-15 were just what I needed at this very moment. Here is what the KJV Life Application Bible had to say about verses 13-16 of Phil 3.
"Paul had reason to feel sorrow about the past...We have all done things for which we are ashamed, and we all live in the tension of what we have been and what we want to be. Because our hope is in Christ, however, we can let go of the past guilt and look forward to what he will help us become. Don't dwell on your past. Instead, grow in the knowledge of God by concentrating on your relationship with him now. Realize you are forgiven, and then move on to a life of faith and obedience...Sometimes striving for Christian perfection can be so difficult that it leaves us drained and discouraged. We may feel so far from perfect that we think we can never please God with our lives. Paul used 'perfect' to mean mature or complete, not flawless in every detail..."
I am not perfect! No this does not mean I was off the hook for my anger, but it does mean I can ask forgiveness and move on. I do not have to beat myself up. I messed up and I thankfully I have a forgiving God and a forgiving family. I am striving to "mature" in my knowledge and faith in Christ.
After I said I was sorry, my husband said, "It is already forgotten." I smiled to myself and realized my Heavenly Father has said the same thing to me. No I don't deserve it, but He thankfully offers me the grace of forgiveness every single day of my life.
Today's Verses
Isaiah 38:17c "for thou hast cast all my sins behind thy back."
Isaiah 43:25 "I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins."
Isaiah 44:22a "I have blotted out, as a thick cloud, thy transgressions."
Isaiah 55:7b "and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon."
I think I may have used some of these verses recently, but I really needed them today! I hope if you are beating yourself up about a past sin or a sin that happened just a few minutes ago, you will remember that our God is the ONE TRUE GOD of mercy and grace and forgiveness! He has already forgotten as soon as you ask Him to.
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